When your hermeneutic stumbles and your exegesis flops and the Bible is so foreign that your conregation pops; then add some razzle dazzle to the sermon that you preach bring an apple dapple rapple to the pulpit with a peach. Forget about confessions and the doctrines we hold tops and rub the peaches fuzz fuzz on each member till he drops; Feed them apple dapple rapple till each one you make him screach and they hickle pickle tickle like St. Fickle when you teach. Syncopation, insulation, aviation too are the topics you should teach them so they always know "how to." How to lay a babled cable to the stable of the Lord and how to play the jump rope with the everlasting Word. Synthesizers excorcise the duldrums and the blues and they tickle fickle wickles to the bottoms of their shoes. They don't want law or gospel it's too hard to think about, they want to go home laughin' with some peach fuzz and a shout. So dump those old dry hymnals with their humble bumble stuff and get a new projector till you've stilled all of their guff. They may not learn salvation or damnation to avoid, but they'll sumble tumble bumble and not mumble a bad woid. With their fickle wickles tickled, and their hands raised up in praise They'll find the antichrist where every poggle-hoggle strays And looking 'round about, with their ears all filled with din From the trumpet's blaring noises and the drums a drumminin They'll think their jumpin'-bumpin' heartbeat is the Spirit caught within The prancin' of their dancin' and the 'we just wanna-in'.' How smart and ever clever in their worship -- yes, they are! Give them a bit more practice, and they'll have Him in a jar!