People like to be entertained. More and more congregations are realizing that contemporary worship can be the bridge between church and entertainment, and are de-emphasizing the “churchy” aspects of worship (such as creeds, liturgies, and the pastor’s vestments), and are encouraging people to sit back and enjoy the praise band. How can Lutherans jump on the bandwagon and get the unchurched inside our church doors?
1. Why not take the next logical step along the entertainment line by offering popcorn, soft drinks and other light snacks for the worshippers to enjoy while they are at church? A communion wafer and a slurp of wine (or grape juice) really aren’t enough to hold most of us until lunchtime. As a fundraiser, the youth group can operate a concession stand in the narthex, or perhaps move discreetly through the congregation during worship with one of those big boxes of snacks like they have at the ballpark.
2. A 24-hour drive-through window installed at the church would really help those who just don’t have an hour a week to spare, but who nevertheless do want to get in touch with their spirituality. At the window, families could deposit their weekly offerings and pick up their pre-consecrated communion wafers, individual servings of wine, and a bulletin. Perhaps, if funds were available, we could even provide a taped copy of the sermon so folks could listen while they’re stuck in traffic.
3. One of the major competitors with worship is weekend sports. Since we’d like to see more men in church, why not install some personal headsets in the pews, pre-tuned to local sports radio? This way, Dad won’t miss out on what’s really important to him while Mom and the kids enjoy the security of having the spiritual head of the household at church with them. We can remove the hymnals to make room, since the praise band will be leading the singing.
4. Beanie Babies are hot! A collectors’ series of the 12 apostles (a new disciple each week!) is sure to keep the pre-teen girls coming back to church. After that series runs out, there are loads of other possibilities: the 10 lepers, the 4 horsemen; why, a Noah’s ark series could last for years!
5. Some unbelievers are offended by absolutes. We live in a society where moral relativism is the order of the day. To make sure unbelievers don’t get uncomfortable and leave, any reference to God, morality, sin, and salvation should be removed from the worship service. Creeds, of course, would not be allowed.
6. The Bible contains words about God, morality, sin and salvation, so the pew Bibles will have to be removed. Somebody might read one and get upset.
7. Research has shown that vegetarians are very turned off by the idea of eating someone’s body or drinking his blood. So, rather than risk having who-knows-how-many vegetarians burn for all eternity because they just couldn’t bring themselves to come to the Lord’s Supper, it would be preferable to remove any references to the Words of Institution. Besides, those words are straight from the Bible (see point #6). A non-denominational prayer could be substituted, such as, “Over the teeth, Past the gums, Look out, Stomach! Here it comes!”
8. Everyone knows how concerned parents are about television violence and its affect on kids (and rightly so!). As the cross is an extremely powerful reminder of torture and death, it may cause parents some concern to see it displayed. Therefore, it would be advisable for church members to refrain from wearing cross necklaces or lapel pins, and to remove any cross imagery from the sanctuary and grounds.
9. Unfortunately, most Sunday School materials make reference to the Bible, and often have cross images, or even show pictures of Jesus dying on the cross. Rather than risk a lawsuit from parents for displaying inappropriate material to minors, it would be safer to just show some nice cartoons during Sunday School.
10. On Friendship Sunday, instead of inviting friends to our church, why not encourage our members to go to their friends’ churches? What better way to get to know our friends than by attending their worship services? Perhaps we can even learn something!
Implementing some of these ideas will really show people we take our faith seriously. We are willing to be all things to all people. We are willing to be unselfish in our worship and make sure visitors are comfortable, no matter what. And, most important, we are not the least bit dogmatic about religion.
Beth Nieman Phoenix, AZ